Steve does a great job of writing daily. Me not so much, as I seem to cover more of the major events on my mind through out the week. One of my recent highlights surrounded the grieving of our good, best friend, Buddy. Oh how I miss his tiny little face, his furry kisses, his bouncy smile, his companionship.
For the first week or so of our trek, I carried his purple dinosaur. Heck, I slept with it for weeks after his passing! But I got a little consumed with the fear of losing it somewhere along the Pacific Crest Trail, so when we met up with Danielle and Fam, they took the purple dinosaur home for safe keeping.
Steve and I made the decision to let Buddy go before we began to hike. Our friends were planning to keep him, so he definitely had a place to stay, but in our hearts we knew it was our responsibility to do right by him and by them.
We couldn’t send him to friends when his time was so short.
Buddy loved it when we moved downtown. He had zero stairs since we simply walked down the hall to a dog balcony for the bathroom and it was literally like he moved to assisted living.
He perked up like a puppy! I would try to get him to walk up one flight of stairs to the gym and he would stand in front of the elevator, refusing to move!
But then his age caught up. He was getting confused, sometimes just going in the closet to stand for a while. Sometimes he didn’t recognize us.
Sometimes he asked for his dinosaur like it was on the bed and he couldn’t reach it, but really it was right next to him and he didn’t know. He was exhausted after family and friend get togethers.
Very exhausted after playing with his fur friends, Ava and Stella. And a growth started between his eyes. He pawed at it a lot. The vet scraped it off. We chose not to get the test, but the vet said if it grew back it was likely cancer.
It did grow back, larger than before. Buddy pawed at it till it bled so we knew it caused him pain.
All this to say, we knew his time was very short. We knew we needed to love him enough to let him go. It broke us both.
So what does this have to do with hiking and wooden bridges? We passed a couple one morning this week. They were awesome.
And then we came around a bend and saw this bridge.
I cried the whole way to it. It’s hard to tell but it’s multi colored and is actually named The Rainbow Bridge.
We decided it was the perfect place to leave part of Buddy’s ashes, which we’ve been carrying as we hike.
We stood in the middle of the Rainbow Bridge and said another goodbye. We still have one more small part of his ashes and will carry him along with us.
He’s in our hearts.
He’s on our minds.
We love you and miss you, Buddy The Dog McGarvey.